☞ playwriting ☜
FRANKIE: Fine. Um... Would you say I’m thriving amidst the modern Sexual Revolution?
STEPHEN: Ha! Sorry. Sorry... I’m sorry. (beat) Would you say that?
BETH: Do they want a sex diary?
FRANKIE: No, not–Why is that–?
STEPHEN: How does that work when you don’t date?
FRANKIE: I date!
BETH: You’re conflating the two. You can have a diary’s-worth of casual sex without dating.
STEPHEN: Are you doing that??
FRANKIE: Can I just–? I need to know that you both know it’s not a sex diary. Is that–?
Frankie Needs a Muse
Frankie’s editor has given her a nightmare assignment: write about the Free Love Movement of today. Too bad Frankie would rather jump in the river than publish a think piece about her sex life…
A full-length play, 10 actors
THERAPIST (Jim’s, as Alison imagines him): In psychoanalytic theory, we explain the psyche in three parts: the ego–conscious–the super-ego–internalized and id–instinctual, primitive, sexual. Aha! That’s why you’re marrying Alison: you think of her as your mother! You can thank your id for that!
ALISON: I went a more conventional route.
The THERAPIST sheds his old-school look. He changes into ALISON’s image of her own therapist: modern, approachable.
THERAPIST (Alison’s): Do you find it difficult to ask for help?
ALISON (To the audience): Yes.
THERAPIST: Why do you think that might be?
ALISON: Parents.
Daddy issues
Alison and Jim are getting married in a month. As a mutual engagement gift, they’ve both agreed to work out their repressed issues in therapy. In theory, it’s a great idea. In practice, it sucks.
A ten-minute play, 3 actors
ERIN (To AÄRON): She said she doesn’t know them. I believe her. They don’t even look like / the same couple.
AÄRON: I don’t know where the other ones went! I can’t show up with no one!
ERIN (To JESS): They said... Look, they’re looking for an American, and you fit–
AÄRON (Fed up with the door): Deze Godverdomme deur!
CHARLIE: You have to leave the key in for a sec.
JESS: Charlie?! / What is happening?!
CHARLIE: Yeah! Jess! Hey! You can’t–You have to leave the key in for a sec and then pull it out quickly. It... Otherwise it doesn’t read it.
We hear them try it. A distinctly negative beep.
CHARLIE: Just like... In, “one Mississippi,” out.
They try it again. Unsuccessful.
Room service
Jess is engaged to Charlie. Charlie’s been kidnapped by Aäron. Aäron is in love with Erin. Erin is the Dutch-English translator. She also has a gun. Aäron lost theirs. Wait, Jess was kidnapped too. With Charlie? Where did Aäron and Erin go? Who the hell is Mrs. Shui Yijun? Henk is trying to order room service.
A one-act play, 6 actors
The spotlight expands to fit the NARRATOR. They pick up the fifty-dollar bill.
NARRATOR: There’s a big economic divide in the world. Some of you can’t see shit from back there!
The NARRATOR glares at the back of the audience as if staring into the sun. They give an exaggerated “over here” wave.
NARRATOR: Some of you, on the other hand, can see that this is a fifty-dollar bill, not a ten-dollar bill. (To one patron in the front row) Would you confirm?
The patron confirms.
NARRATOR: Louder. They can’t hear you in the back; they’re poor.
how very brecht of you
A business man, a poor man, and just a man sit in the park. Also, the narrator's there.
A five-minute play, 4 actors
